College admissions scandal highlights lost art of hard work
During my senior year of high school, I moved from my childhood home and rented a room a few streets away. To pay my expenses, my parents agreed to cover the rent, and I used my earnings waiting tables at a nearby nursing home to cover the utilities. Hungry for independence, I decided to leave the comfort of my Catholic school upbringing and the cushy accommodations with my parents, and instead go to an inner-city public school in an underserved neighborhood many miles away from the place I was living.
This was a transitional period where I prioritized partying with my friends, drinking alcohol and fitting in over schoolwork, and while I somehow managed to graduate high school, academically I learned very little and felt miserable working a number of dead-end jobs and ended up graduating with a lowly 1.7 grade-point average.
Obviously, I was not ready to be a responsible adult, but at the same time, I felt no one was going to tell me what to do. I resented authority figures giving me advice. I had an overall entitlement attitude, and like many sully, moody teenagers, I thought I knew what was best for me better than anyone else.
I then watched as all my private school friends started applying to colleges and eventually getting accepted and preparing for adulthood. I remember feeling very envious of them. My parents could not afford to send me to college, and I was torn between my priority of late night fun getting drunk at bars with girlfriends, but also wanting to go to school so I could attend more dorm parties, more fraternity house get-togethers, and just maybe figuring out what I wanted to do for the rest of my life.
I now realize how skewed my thinking was at the time, how having that college experience was not going to solve any of my problems, or bring me the status I so deeply desired, nor was attending school going to magically give me life learning skills.
What I did not understand then, but know now is that it’s only through hard work over a period of years in a chosen craft one gains true joy and satisfaction.
With the recent college admissions bribery scandal of parents cheating the college entrance process to get their child a coveted school seat, it reminds me how far off-track society had come in our quick-fix and impulse-driven culture. It no longer seems as valued as perhaps in years past to practice endlessly at a craft till it’s done correctly. In my late teens, I too got sucked into thinking that simply being a passive sponge soaking up knowledge was going to somehow prepare me for the suck of the real world.
It’s time to bring back the joy of hard work and toiling away at a skill with the goal of mastery. There are no shortcuts to doing this. My husband exemplifies this edict as he’s been mechanically inclined all his life, and over time he continually gets better. He started as a child taking apart toys and tinkering with anything he could get his hands on. Later, he honed skills in carpentry, electrical circuitry, plumbing, engine repair, air conditioning, and pretty much anything else that needs repairing on a car, house, or boat.
If he gets stuck fixing something, he doesn’t just give up and call a repair person. Instead, he relentlessly searches online for a video tutorial or scans message boards for ideas on what the problem might be. Because of this skill and perseverance, he can work fewer hours in a “normal” job and manage his own time. For example, he buys cars off of Craigslist that are in need of multiple repairs, then fixes them up and sells them at a significant profit. This makes him financially independent. He even uses his skills at RV repairs and video editing to help others via his YouTube page. Additionally, we both live on less than half our income, putting away money that can be spread out in leaner times when we may not be generating an income. This way, we can spend time on hobbies or volunteer projects that we are passionate about.
When I look at the freedom my husband is able to enjoy because of his skills and his financial discipline, it reminds me that anyone can develop these attributes. If one is willing to put in the time, effort and discipline, they too can embrace this lifestyle. It took him years to get to where he is, but it's well worth it when he can live anywhere in the world occupying his time with self-directed projects. He never struggles to pay his bills, due to living well below his means and putting away money. There's always a worthwhile project to occupy his time and generate income when needed.
In the book, A Whole New Mind, the author Daniel Pink argues that because of automation, outsourcing and living in a culture of abundance, having a generalized business degree just won’t cut it anymore. Instead, the author advocates cultivating skills that can set people apart from the rest, be that in design, music, storytelling, or counseling. Pink identifies these “right-brain skills,” which are intangible in nature but can fuse together to craft a strategic personal narrative that takes one beyond a basic task that can be replicated by the masses.
Besides my love of storytelling, I intend to one day use Navy Tuition Assistance to get certified in counseling. In the meantime, while on operational sea duty, I’ll soak up every opportunity to deepen into not only Navy public affairs, but my own niche in this industry working with deploying surface ships. Looking ahead, this may mean getting Information Warfare qualified, but recently I learned how to respond to a nuclear emergency from a public affairs perspective. I’m a lifelong learner, and it’s by gaining skills that transcend my day-to-day work duties that sets me apart from the rest. This also keeps my mind challenged, helps me be a better asset to any unit I join, and it reminds me that there is no substitute for hard work and sustained involvement in an area of expertise.
It’s never too late to come to this insight and begin to figure out how to harness creativity and design. There are always baby steps to build upon to something larger. There are numerous books that have helped me break the soul-crushing 9-5 mentality and embrace my niche expertise. In addition to the book I mentioned above, I highly recommend The 4-Hour Workweek, by Timothy Farris. The book is jam-packed with advice on how to take control of one’s time and strategically apply it where it matters most.
As I enter mid-life, I find myself reflective on the idea that my days on this planet are numbered, so my objective is to make the most out of that time, taking care of myself, learning interesting skills, and then using those tools to advocate for the causes where I can make the most impact.